Success in the dance world

Let's talk about success in the dance world.

Climbing the ladder of success in dance is full of tough choices. It hurts to be an artist who isn't seen, who isn't visible, who isn't appreciated. So when an opportunity comes that promises to lift you a few rungs at once — skipping the ones that take time — it's tempting. We all want to be successful, and we all want it now.

But what if that opportunity costs someone else? What if the only way up is to treat people poorly?

We look at the top dancers and we see the surface — the success, the visibility, the applause. We don't see the work behind it. We don't see the sacrifices, or the choices made quietly along the way, or the price paid to stand where they stand. The attitude of "do whatever it takes" sounds bold, but it's a quieter kind of corrosion. I don't believe in it.

So when those moments come — when there's a faster way up, but the cost is someone else — I'd want you to sit with the question of what success actually means to you. Not to others. Not to the room. To you. Is it being known, or is it being able to live with yourself?

Everyone tells us to choose what feels better. But there are two kinds of feeling better, and they don't behave the same way.

The first is short-term. Popularity, money, admiration, validation — they hit fast and they hit bright. The dopamine spikes, and then it drops, and nothing feels like enough. You can be on top of the world and still wake up empty.

The second is slower. Peace of mind is priceless, and the knowledge that you hurt someone to get where you are is unbearable in a way that no amount of applause covers up. The reward of the slow kind lasts. It's the kind of reward the body actually settles into. Sometimes we have to step back from the bright, fast version of joy long enough for the small joys to come back into focus — the little pleasures we stop noticing when we're only chasing big ones.

Please don't get blinded by the short-term. The long-term result always arrives, in one of two forms: peace or pain. I'd rather stay authentic than popular — and I'd wish that for you, too.

What is success to you, my friend? Title, popularity, money, admiration — or knowing that you showed love to people along the way? We have all made mistakes. We have all hurt someone, and we have all been hurt. Hurt people hurt others. But if you've done the work to heal yourself, you will want to treat others with love, and you'll break the patterns you inherited.

Remember how it feels long-term. Learn from what's behind you. Be honest with yourself about what you actually want.

In your heart, you already know the right answer.